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"Pay close attention now," says Elkins, jostling the lever of the remote control in her hand as she squints out to sea at the tiny golden jetski skirting dangerously close to the jagged off-shore rocks. "Because this is the really tricky part."
The unseasonably bright February sun glints off of the chrome of the Coast Guard Cruiser plowing its way through the waves towards the jetski. It throws the detailing on the side of a fast-moving pleasure yacht into sharp relief, and casts a dull sheen on the inner tube bobbing innocently nearby.
"The thing that you must understand," says Elkins, frowning in concentration as these small craft begin to converge, "is that everything about this scenario is just utterly and completely wrong. Characterization. Wrong. Motivation. Wrong. Spirit of Ca—"
She draws in a sharp breath as the jetski angles its way between two low rocks, barely visible beneath the waves, then lets it out, very slowly.
"Spirit of Canon," she repeats hoarsely, her hands now shaking slightly on the controls. "Spirit of Canon. Oh. So. Wrong."
The Coast Guard Cruiser picks up speed as it nears its prey, weaving to one side to avoid the low-lying rocks, while the pleasure yacht, its passengers staring enthralled through their Omniscopes at the name 'Cupid's Snitch' engraved on the side of the jetski, veers a bit closer to the reef. Elkins leans forward, hunched over her controls.
"But," she continues, a fine sheen of sweat now appearing on her forehead. "But, but, but. But. If you combine all of these wrong elements just so, and then get the timing juuuuuuuuuuuuuust right..."
With a sudden convulsive motion, she slams the joystick away from her, while simultaneously jabbing down hard on the turbo button. The tiny golden jetski surges forward, sending up a fine spray as it darts between the two larger and more cumbersome vessels, whose crewmembers have only a second to stare after it in amazement before they realize that they are now set on a collision course. Their barked orders and panicked screams can only be faintly heard from shore as cruiser and yacht desperately maneuver to avoid one another, only to batter their hulls to pieces moments later on the treacherous off-shore rocks. The inner tube flies into the air, landing only a little worse for the wear on a large flat rock several yards away. The jetski darts merrily off, out to open sea.
Elkins exhales hard and leans back against her rock, allowing the controls to fall from her hands. After a moment, she turns to the younger mermaid sitting on the rock beside her and smiles.
"And that," she concludes, with grim satisfaction. "Is what we call the 'Wrong Ski Feint.'"
"Would you believe," she asks, giggling suddenly as she gestures out at the jetski now bobbing its way across the waves. "Would you believe that some people actually think that I'm out there riding around on that ridiculous thing?"
"But master," the younger mermaid objects, her voice muffled from deep within her scuba mask. "Master..."
Elkins frowns. "What?"
"I thought that we were supposed to be...well, you know. Singing."
"Singing?" Elkins snorts and rolls her eyes. "Singing! Oh, Grasshopper! Sweetheart! Please! This is the twenty-first century!"
The tiny golden jetski flits off into the distance, soon to be lost once more to sight.
==================
Yes. Erm. Well.
Oh, dear.
You see, naturally I am very touched—truly touched and deeply flattered—that so many people liked Cupid's Snitch so much, but...um...
Well, really now. It hardly seems plausible, does it? And surely someone must have noticed that every single direct canonical quotation cited in that message as "evidence" for the theory was really just cut-and-pasted directly from a previous C.U.P.I.D.S.B.L.U.D.G.E.R message—yea, down to the very ellipses?
I don't know. I really just don't know. I pour my heart, my soul, my very essence into my Fourth Man theory, I offer irreproachable evidence that it is canonically RIGHT and TRUE, I beg and whine and wheedle and cajole, but does anyone believe me? Nooooooooo. But then I toss something like Cupid's Snitch into the air, and everyone leaps onto their broomsticks and starts riding hell-bent-for-leather after it. I don't get it. I really just don't get it.
But I do feel that I owe a huge apology to Captain Charis Julia. Sorry, Captain. I meant only to poke playfully at your inner tube, not to send it spinning off into the eddies like that. And while you were away taking your exams, too! Here's hoping that they all went well.
Cap'n Charis Julia of the Good Ship C.U.P.I.D.S.B.L.U.D.G.E.R. boomed out (while scowling and glaring menacingly at mutinous sailors):
Elkins where did you come up with all of that?
<Elkins nods respectfully at Captain Charis, then looks up innocently, an effect somewhat ruined by the suspicious twitching at the corner of her mouth>
Why, from my strictly irreproachable extrapolations from canon, of course. SIR!
Astounding! I take my hat of to you, really I do! Unfortunately however I don't buy a word of it.
No. Neither do I, not for a moment. But it sure was fun while it lasted, wasn't it?
Cupid's Snitch does not explain what all these theories set out to explain in the first place, namely why did Snape cross over to the sunny side of the street after all?
Oh. Right. That old thing.
Well, as to that, I'm a Georgian, myself. (Or...at least I think I am. But that's an entirely different snarl of threads.) But Cupid's Snitch was never intended to address that issue at all. Cupid's Snitch was a direct response to Cindy's plea for some extra motivation for Sirius' Prank, and for Sirius and Snape's mutual loathing—preferably one that would somehow involve the Unknown Damsel Florence.
Now personally, I don't think that any additional motivation for hatred between these two men other than what has already been provided by canon is in the least bit necessary. It makes perfect sense to me that they never liked each other to begin with, that the potential lethality of the Prank was a matter of pure and simple thoughtlessness on Sirius' part, that Dumbledore's reaction infuriated and disillusioned young Severus, that his conviction that Black really always had been by nature a murderer was confirmed in his own mind by later events, and that what happened at the end of PoA did absolutely nothing to make either of the two men like each other any better. Here I am in full agreement with Pippin and Charis: what canon has already given us seems like more than enough to account for their mutual antipathy. To my way of thinking, anyway.
But apparently some people just aren't satisfied with all of that. They must have more -- more, more, more! So Cupid's Snitch was my highly tongue-in-cheek attempt to Give The People What They Want, with a good deal of really sappy SHIPpiness thrown in, just for good measure.
I didn't really think that anyone was going to go chasing after the damned thing.
Cap'n Tabouli of the Good Ship L.O.L.L.I.P.O.P.S., showed admirable restraint by starting off with the deliciously-understated comment:
My main issues with it are character based (and therefore rather subjective).
*much laughter*
What, you mean to say that you don't think that Sirius would have trembled in fear at the prospect of Peter disapproving of his choice of date? Or that the future Mrs. Lestrange would have gone skulking around behind the greenhouses to avoid exposure? Or that she would have then gone trailing all puppy-dog-like after Severus, pestering him to teach her some really cool curses? Why ever not?
Yes, of course the characterization is appalling. But then, you couldn't honestly expect someone as perverse as I am to resist that temptation, now, could you? Or to refrain from recasting the odious Lestranges as the post-Yule-Ball Ron and Hermione? Or to allow to pass by unchecked the opportunity to raise the spectre of a non-gone-bad version of the Ever-So-Evil Mrs. Lestrange, padding around barefoot in her kitchen and baking cookies for the kiddies? I mean, for heaven's sake, woman, do you think that I am made out of stone?
But an awful lot of people seem to have really really liked Cupid's Snitch, and not as parody either, but as speculation (someone mentioned the possibility of putting it on the list of "predictions for Book Five," for example). And that was...unexpected. To say the least.
I'm beginning to suspect that Cupid's Snitch's appeal must have had something to do with that F.L.A.B.B.E.R.G.A.S.T.E.D. or L.O.S.T.L.I.V.E.S. aspect of the tale: many people do seem to find something about the notion of an Embittered-Due-To-Lack-of-Luck-In-Love-With-Sirius-Black Florence Lestrange well-nigh irresistable.
I think that we may be running into a bit of Sympathy for the Devil here, no?
So let's see if we can salvage Cupid's Snitch, shall we? Is there a defensible version of this backstory that can (a) manage to retain the same appeal while (b) remaining sufficiently perverse to hold even my interest?
I think that there is. We can call this one, er..."Cupid's Quaffle."
Cupid's Quaffle allows the characters to behave more or less as themselves, while still (I hope) retaining the basic SHIPpiness and Sympathy-For-the-Devil-ness that made people like Cupid's Snitch so much. And, of course, it has every bit as much direct canonical support *snicker* as Cupid's Snitch had.
As an added bonus, I've also thrown in a bit of backstory to provide additional answers to such perennial favorites as "Why was everyone, even Dumbledore, so willing to believe that Sirius Black was a mad killer?" and "Why did Sirius get so very hysterical when Peter framed him?"
(I haven't the slightest idea why people always want more answers to these questions, mind—again, I think that canon provides plenty of answers to both of them just fine as it is—but people always do seem to want more reasons, so Cupid's Quaffle is happy to provide.)
Cupid's Quaffle also accomodates LOLLIPOPSers by allowing for a reading in which Snape's relationship to Florence is purely platonic—thus permitting him to remain creepily and solely romantically fixated on Lily Evans, if such is the reader's desire.
And finally—But wait! There's more!—Cupid's Quaffle can also allow for a (slightly altered) rendition of Tabouli's marvellous Seduction of Barty Crouch. This is because as far as I can tell, I may well be young Barty's only true fan on this entire list. I am therefore thrilled to support anything that might make him more sympathetic to other readers.
So here is Cupid's Quaffle. Cupid's Quaffle permits Sirius to be cool, handsome, charismatic, popular and impulsive, and it allows Florence, as the future Mrs. Lestrange, to be passionate, obsessive, tenacious and defiant.
There is, however, one very important point of characterization on which Cupid's Quaffle absolutely depends, and that is this:
At the age of fifteen, Florence was not Dead Sexy.
Tabouli wrote:
More likely her loyalty to Slytherin would preclude such a relationship in the first place (unless fuelled by some sinister, manipulative ulterior motive), or, if his Dead Sexiness was too much to resist, she would have seduced him, cool, sultry and unashamed. And in public, in front of the whole of Slytherin and Gryffindor, if necessary to prove her point.
At twenty-two, perhaps. But at fifteen? Naaaah.
Because fifteen-year-old Florence isn't either sultry or seductive. I mean, think about it. Do we really believe the Mrs. Lestrange we see in Pensieve as someone who was considered desirable as an adolescent? Does a fifteen year old girl who was in the habit of wrapping the boys around her little finger through her seductive and feminine wiles really grow up to become a woman who curses two people into a state of insanity out of sheer enraged frustration that they can't tell her what she wants to know?
Oh, I don't think so.
No, I don't think that she was Dead Sexy at all in her youth. Far from it. In fact, I think that what we were looking at there in Pensieve must have been one of Tabouli's favorite types of people: an Ex-Victim Turned Bully.
So in Cupid's Bludger, Dead Sexy Florence is replaced by late-bloomer Florence. Florence, who values the opinion of her male Slytherin friends so highly because she just doesn't have any female friends (all of the other Slytherin girls in her year are really caught up in this whole "Marry High, Marry Young, Breed Pureblooded Children For the Cause" schtick, see, while Flo's a rabid feminist). Florence, who hasn't yet learned that charm she'll use later in life to take all the frizz out of her hair and make it all lustrous and shiny (an entire bottle of that Sleekeasy junk would surely do the trick, but that's far too much work for everyday, and besides, fifteen-year-old Flo would rather die than suck up to the Patriarchy like that). Florence, who doesn't laugh at the boys' jokes unless she really thinks that they're funny. Florence, whose heavy-lidded eyes strike all of the boys her age as weird-looking and strange, and Not At All Attractive. (Yes, they are mad. They're also only fifteen years old, so they haven't yet developed good taste.)
In short, while Florence may be passionate, obsessive, tenacious, defiant, and proud to the point of self-destruction, one thing she isn't is considered a "good catch."
So why is cool, charismatic, handsome, popular, impulsive (but not always terribly sensitive to other people's feelings) Sirius Black snogging with her behind the greenhouses?
Well, because as Dead Sexy as he may be, Sirius Black is still a fifteen year old boy. And Florence is willing. And at the age of fifteen, willing is very very important.
Oh, now, just stop that, Sirius fans. He doesn't mean to be toying with the poor girl's affections, all right? He just isn't particularly thinking. You know how good he can be at that "not particularly thinking" thing that he does.
And besides, it's not as if he dislikes her or anything. He thinks old Flo's a pretty good egg, for a Slytherin. He enjoys her company well enough. She's clever and opinionated and sort of interesting, and he has no clue that she's actually kinda twisted. But it's hardly Twoo Wuv. It's not even True Love. It's not anything even close to that. Not by a long shot. Not at all.
So Sirius isn't meeting poor Florence behind the greenhouses because it's a big clandestine Romeo and Juliet type thing. No, he's meeting her there because that's just what you do when you meet girls for little adolescent snogging sessions at Hogwarts. That's where everyone goes. It's just what's done. And he's not exactly hiding it from his friends. He just hasn't thought to mention it, that's all. After all, why would he? It's not like he's in love with the girl or anything. They're not even dating. They're just kinda messing around for kicks every now and then, that's all. And besides, it's not like she's the only girl he ever takes back there.
But Florence thinks it's serious.
*pause for wince*
No. Er...well, you know what I mean. She doesn't get it. She, too, is only fifteen years old, remember, and she's led a very sheltered life. So it doesn't occur to her that meeting someone every once in a while for smoochies behind the greenhouses, while never actually being seen with them in public, doesn't constitute a real relationship. As far as she's concerned, this is It. She's found it. True Love. 'Till Death Do We Part Love. It's the first grand passion of her young life, and it's a secret passion to boot, because she really is keeping it a secret from her Slytherin buds. It's not just that they wouldn't approve (although they wouldn't). It's more that...well, it's hers. It's her Grand Passion. It's special. It's secret. And besides, it's more romantic that way.
Yeah, she's young. And she's also a tad obsessive. As well as loyal, passionate, committed, slightly prone to self-delusion and self-aggrandizement...but then, we already knew all that about her, didn't we?
So that's the deal. There they are, Sirius and Florence, kissing behind the greenhouses. Nosy Bertha Jorkins—the original "Cupid's Snitch"—catches them at it and begins to make mock...and it is Florence who hexes her, the instant that her back is turned.
Well, of course it is! It must have been Florence all along. After all, would Sirius really hex some girl for teasing him for kissing someone, of all things? I doubt it. But Florence would, because she's proud and prickly and vindictive and (at this stage in her life) insecure, and she cannot bear being mocked. And besides, she likes hexing people.
So Florence hexes Bertha. Sirius, alarmed by the suddenly feral expression on the face of his ordinarily tranquil-seeming companion—not to mention her apparent readiness to keep on hexing Bertha, even though she's certainly more than made her point already—snatches her wand out of her hands and is still standing there holding it when Bertha finally manages to recover enough to turn around to see what has happened. Bertha goes running off to Dumbledore, squealing about how Sirius Black hexed her when all she did was tease him for kissing Florence behind the greenhouses, and pretty soon everyone in the entire school knows the story.
And so you see, this is yet another reason that Dumbledore didn't find it all that hard to believe that Sirius Black was a Big Bad Dark wizard, and a raving murderer to boot. Just look at how he behaved at the age of fifteen! Clearly bad-tempered. Clearly capable of nastiness. And this is also part of the reason that Sirius began laughing madly when Peter left him there in the street, wand out and dead muggles everywhere. It wasn't merely because his best friends had been murdered, it was all his fault, he'd just failed miserably in his attempt to avenge their deaths, and now he was going to be framed for the crime itself. It wasn't merely because little Peter had just snookered him with such utterly unexpected ruthlessness. It wasn't merely because he was in such a completely hopeless situation. No! One might think that all this would be ample cause for wild laughter, but apparently it still isn't enough, so here you go: Sirius was also laughing because he'd been had this way before.
What's that? Why did Sirius never try to set anyone straight on what really happened, you ask? Well, because he's chivalrous, that's why. Good Guys Don't Rat People Out -- and they especially don't rat girls out. Besides, he's popular with the staff and with the Headmaster, so they'll probably cut him more slack than they'd cut Florence. And also, he's feeling kind of guilty over the whole affair. He's got some idea of how Florence's Slytherin buds are likely to react when they find out that she's been Consorting With the Enemy; the situation is made even worse by the fact that her parents are in prison
He's also feeling guilty because he knows that he's going to have to stop seeing her.
It was that look in her eyes, you see. Kinda spooked him that did. He always thought she was okay, really, but now he thinks there's something...well, something very wrong with the girl. He doesn't really want to have anything more to do with her.
Hmmm? What's that, Charis?
Charis:
And one more thing: Florence must have been a splendid actress. Sirius was so into her and never realized she was heading right down the path that leads to You—Know—Who's front door?
"Hey, guys, I've got a great idea! Let's make Peter the Secret-Keeper!"
No, Florence was never a good actress. But she didn't need to be. This is Sirius Black we're talking about, remember. He didn't have a clue.
But now he does. He starts avoiding her until she confronts him, and then he just explains that maybe they shouldn't, um, see each other. Anymore. He's kind of uncomfortable. Florence reads his tone as pity. She is struck by her Grand Realization: this guy never loved her. He wasn't even using her, which she could at least respect. No. No, he pitied her. Those were Sympathy Snogs they were sharing back there behind the greenhouses.
The rest of the story is pretty much the same. Florence, Loved and Abandoned by Black, Becomes EnRaged, Goes After Severus, and Turns Evil Deatheater. Love of Sirius Turns Lestrange Into Voldemort's Evil Servant. And all of that.
And you know, Severus doesn't even have to have a crush on her in this version. He can just feel protective of her, as a manifestation of House loyalty. (Gryffindors are too good to be seen with our girls in public, are they? Our girls are only suitable for seducing in secret. are they?) But it still has the same effect on Sirius: leading him to suspect that Snape was responsible all along for Florence's unfortunate Dark tendencies.
Charis wrote:
It goes against all my instincts to accept that Sirius had a girlfriend that went Wrong and that's really what my objections boil down to.
Yeah, it went against all of Sirius' instincts as well. That's why he had to convince himself that it must have been Snape's Bad Influence all along.
So we get the same basic hostility, the same underlying subconscious motive for Sirius' Prank, the same "Sirius Black corrupted one of our girls" thing for Snape, and so forth.
Now we only need to jump ahead a year or so to get Tabouli's Seduction of Barty Crouch scenario.
Tabouli wrote:
Maybe Barty was a good, upstanding, brilliant young Slytherin who had the promise to become one of the house's most upstanding graduates until he fell into the clutches of Florence Lestrange-to-be, who preyed on him for reasons of her own (getting close to the son of the powerful wizard tipped to be the future Minister of Magic and avenging her parents against Barty Senior... see below).
Sounds good to me. Why not?
Now that Florence has already gained a certain degree of notoriety as a Fast Girl, she figures: why not live up to the reputation? Might as well be hanged for a sheep as for a lamb, right? Besides, then maybe Sirius will be sorry that he cast her aside. So she decides to become Dead Sexy Evil Scheming Black Widow Florence.
(SHIPper types should like this part, because it allows for Florence to come back from the summer hols a Changed Girl, with her hair all different and dressing all sexy and making the boys' jaws drop in amazement and all the rest of that rot.)
I like wicked older teen Florence seducing sickly neurasthenic little Momma's Boy Barty to avenge her parents. That's very appealing indeed. The only difference here is that she goes after Barty as a sixth year, not as a fifth year, and he's fourteen, not thirteen, when he falls into her clutches -- 'cause otherwise it's just plain sick.
And of course, in this version of the tale, Bertha Jorkins isn't the one who exposes the affair to Daddy. That was probably Lestrange, undoubtedly acting on Florence's own orders. After all, as Cindy wrote:
She wants Mr. Lestrange, a man who knows how to keep his mouth shut and do what he is told. Mr. Lestrange is a SYCOPHANT (are hen-pecked men welcome in SYCOPHANT?).
Society of Yes-Men, Cowards, Ostriches, Passive-Aggressives...
Yup! Yes, they are. Hen-pecked men are almost always passive-aggressive. And even if Lestrange isn't, then he can still claim SYCOPHANTS membership under the umbrella category of "Abject Neurotics."
We're really very inclusive that way.
Tabouli wrote:
Little did both Crouch Senior know, his actions played right into Florence's hands. Barty Junior abandoned his last hope of ever pleasing his father and set to rebellion in earnest. As his years at Hogwarts slipped by, he progressed from snogging Dark Ladies to torturing first years, hexing Gryffindors, and serving teachers cursed pumpkin juice.
Oh, yes. Yes indeedy. He also took to ripping the tags off of all of the mattresses. And to jaywalking. The poor little tyke.
Hey, I know! We can call this part of Cupid's Quaffle:
F.O.R.L.O.R.N.B.A.R.T.E.M.I.U.S.
(Florence, On the Rebound, Lured Our Reluctant Naif Barty, Avenging Relations by Tempting to Evil Mother's Innocent and Unsuspecting Son.)
Deal?
So, er, where's the canon?
<Elkins collapses into a fit of coughing>
Oh, dear. Yes. Please do excuse me. Something just caught in my throat there for a moment.
Well, the canonical evidence for Cupid's Quaffle is much the same as the canonical evidence for Cupid's Snitch, really. We have:
(1) Mrs. Lestrange's mysterious namelessness, combined with Florence's mysterious mention.
Charis wrote:
I agree that there must be a reason Mrs Lestrange's first name is omitted. It struck me as odd from the very first time I read the book.
It's because she's Florence, I'm tellin' ya. Florence! Even Tabouli's willing to go with this one. She's just holding off on the whole Flo-Has-A-History-With-Sirius thing. But as to that...
(2) Sirius' strange omission of Mrs. Lestranges first or maiden name when he lists her as a member of Snape's old gang, the extent to which she seems "glossed."
Tabouli wrote:
You mean, rather like the way Snape snarls all the time about James the arrogant Quidditch star and how much Harry resembles him, yet avoids any mention of Lily? Or the way Hagrid gives away that there's a very good reason for Snape to hate Harry and then hastily changes the subject (though everyone else is happy to attribute Snape's feelings to jealousy of James' Quidditch performance, a well-known chick impressor)?? Or the way that Lily, though Harry's mother and therefore bound to be significant in some way (as JKR has admitted), has been almost totally glossed over so far, whereas James has had quite a lot of air time??? :-D
Well...yes, actually. Almost precisely like that.
So does that mean that you really are on board with the whole Sirius-Has-Some-History-With-Mrs.-Lestrange thing then, Tabouli?
(Hey, have I ever once claimed not to believe that Snape had a thing for Lily? No. I have not. You know why? Because I'm almost certain that he did. But that doesn't mean that I'm going clambering aboard that ship, mind. Just 'cause I believe it to be canonical truth, that doesn't mean that I have to like it.)
Charis agreed that it struck her as strange, but wrote:
But it seems to me that it's more JKR trying to hide something than Sirius. He passes by the name too flippantly for me to think it means anything to him. . . . Sirius just ticks off the Lestranges along with the rest of them. They're not even significantly placed: not first, not last, just middle.
Which is equally suspicious, don't you think? If not even more so? Given that what he's just been talking about there is Barty Crouch's trial, that he doesn't even mention the fact that the Lestranges were young Crouch's co-defendents (assuming, for the moment, that they really were), but instead just ticks them off, burying them right in the middle of the list?
He's glossing, I tell ya! Glossing! There's something there he doesn't want to think about! Even Cindy's with me on this one!
(3) Dumbledore's Pensieve.
Charis points out that Dumbledore's "But why, Bertha, why?" line there is current dialogue -- he's not saying it to Bertha in the Pensieve, but to himself/Harry, in the present day. And she is quite right. I had misremembered that scene. Mea culpa.
But surely this provides even more support for Cupid's Quaffle! It means that we no longer need to stress Dumbledore's insight or his near-prophetic abilities or any of the sort of nonsense that so annoys both Cindy and Charis in order to view his regret there as twofold — no, sorry, as threefold!
He is speaking in the present day, having just dragged Harry back from the Lestrange/Crouch sentencing. So it requires no great feat of foresight for his weariness and his regret there to be on behalf not only of Bertha, but also of Florence and, as Tabouli suggests, of young Barty himself as well.
The more regrets the merrier, that's what I always say.
And as additional canonical support for Cupid's Bludger, I will also offer:
(4) Sirius' evident sympathy for young Crouch in "Padfoot Returns," and his obvious horror at the boy's supposed "death." He speaks of the event "dully" and "bitterly," and he doesn't look "remotely amused now."
For a moment, the deadened look in Sirius' eyes became more pronounced than ever, as though shutters had closed behind them.
It's not just that he feels particular sympathy for Barty as a fellow victim of elder Crouch's rather dubious grasp of due process. It's not just that the subject recalls unpleasant memories of Azkaban. No! It's also that he suspects that Barty was taken in by scary Florence...just as he might have been. It's a There But For the Grace of God thing. And a guilt thing as well, for really, would any of that have happened at all, if he hadn't treated Florence in such a cavalier fashion in the first place? Who can say?
Pippin wants to know:
But Florence...honestly, what kind of name is that for a Death Eater?
Aw, come on. It's a perfect name for a Death Eater. You can't really expect every last one of them to have a name like "Nefaria" or "Maledicta" or "Perfidia" or "Morticia," can you?
Besides, that's probably a large part of how she got so very fanatical. She was overcompensating. Being a Death Eater Named Flo is kind of like being a Boy Named Sue, you know. It makes you Tough.
Cindy declared herself:
(tempted to ask Elkins to sort out the Gleam in Dumbledore's Eye, once and for all)
Oh, that? That one's easy.
It was just a trick of the light.
Charis, do please tell us about E.L.G.I.N.S.M.A.R.B.L.E.S. Are they anything to do with my own marbles? Because I think that I've misplaced those somewhere...
—Elkins
Posted to HPfGU by Elkins on February 21, 2002 6:03 PM
1 comment (link leads to main site)
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